Happyartz

Pay attention that the conversation begins from the last picture in the post, to the first, and not the other way around.

This conversation is quite confusing to me as well. Like others, I feel that some parts of the convo are missing, and even with that, the artist treated the situation normally from the screenshots you provided, while you sounded quite threatening with your messages.

For someone that their first language isn't English, I could easily get confused by what you demanded (not from the reference picture, but actually from your message). You asked if there's going to be a male part edit for the character, which what might've confused the artist and made them think you'd like them to draw a male part for your character. (You asked them because of the preview image of the YCH, I understand, and the artist should've asked too - at same time they might've thought they knew what they're doing after that question was made.). The issue here comes from both parts. I highly doubt the artist meant to cause you harm personally by 'deciding' to change your character's parts, but rather a big misunderstanding in the language. In the end the artist provided you everything you asked without arguing or a problematic behavior, and didn't go against your wishes after. I'd consider talking to artists differently, even when mistakes are made - not jump into conclusions that the artist did such thing to personally hurt you.

I've read a lot of bewares on this site and this is the only one I personally have to disagree with. By agreeing to commission an artist, you agree to their TOS. Some TOS include the right of the artist to post in-progress and finished commissioned artworks. If you didn't want your commission to be posted and found few things you disagree with their TOS, you should've asked the artist if they could keep the commission private, or not commission them at all. As Celestina said, that would be better if the reference had a close-up side of your OC to see the spikes clearer. The artist made fixes and was willing to work with you normally till you mentioned dispute because they haven't answered you for 4 hours. That would be understandable if that would be for few days while they still update their account daily, but these were only few hours. You must remember that artists don't sit by their computers all day and therefore not gaining a response for few hours is reasonable. 

I think this conflict could be avoided if you could word your message better: instead of mentioning immediately a dispute, you could've stated your concern about the public post and tell them you would like an update soon. They would answer you regardless for mentioning dispute or not, and possibly wouldn't complain and instead just fix the mistake if you hadn't rushed to mention dispute.

The public journal was unprofessional for them to post and possibly wasn't the best idea as that should stay private. At same time, if I were in their place, I'd understand their reason for committing such deed. The main issue of the argument is impatience and unread TOS although the artist mentioned that they gave you to read them before beginning of work. That all could've been avoided.